


'The Final Countdown'

by lady_meatball



Series: A December to Remember [8]
Category: American (US) Actor RPF, Chris Evans (Actor) RPF
Genre: Domestic! Evans, Domestic!Evans, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, K C & the Sunshine Band, K&C, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-11-14 00:32:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11196708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lady_meatball/pseuds/lady_meatball
Summary: Christmas is fast approaching and Katie heads out to her mom’s house.





	'The Final Countdown'

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings-None.

 

[Originally posted by thesimplethingsinlifex](https://tmblr.co/Zmaybo1Yo2pWc)

* * *

‘ _Mom, mom, mummy, mummy, momma, momma, MA! MAA!_ ’

Looking up from the screen of my laptop, where I was researching the steps I’d need to follow through on to legally get my name changed after the New Year, I glanced over at my phone on the cushion next to me, inhaling deeply before scrubbing my hand over my face as I reached my left hand to answer it before Stewie started up another round.

Holding my phone to my ear, I forced a smile onto my face to bolster myself up through the sleepy fog I fought after three large cups of coffee; my insomnia was still hanging around in full force thanks to the nervous but excited anxiety I felt rioting inside me now that the countdown was in the last day of double digits and I was beginning to run on fumes.

“Hey Ma…” I greeted as I tipped my head to one shoulder then the other, sighing happily when both sides popped after sitting on the couch for the last few hours.

“ _Hell-oooo_ …” She greeted, prolonging the vowels in an almost sing-song like way. “What are you doing, sweetheart?”

I sat up, pushing the laptop off my lap and onto the coffee table once I moved my legs off the surface, allowing me to fold my legs and sit with them crossed underneath me. One strand of the face framing layers that were growing out kept falling out of the loose French Braid I had pulled my hair back into earlier, and I lifted my hand to push it back behind my ear.

“Surfing the internet, drinking coffee to help me wake up…” I confessed as a yawn snuck up on me, making my shake my head with the force of it. “What’s up?” I asked, scrubbing a finger to one eye.

“Just sitting out front, having a smoke, drinking my coffee too. I just woke up…how long have you been awake, sweetie?”

I looked up, glancing at the clock in the bottom corner of screen of my computer just in time before the screen saver popped up, showing a slideshow of pictures that started off with a picture Anna had sent me, showing Chris and I leaning back against her counter, drinks in hand, smiling at each other as we got to know one another.

I felt my forced smile soften and turn genuine as I remembered that moment…it was after we had finished recording, after he had joined me in Anna and Pratt’s backyard, after he had me pinned against a wall and after Pratt caught us dry humping and making out like horny teenagers; we hadn’t been left alone together for more than a minute after that, except for that moment, when he had brought up how he felt the need to go camping again and had asked if I enjoyed that particular activity. My answer had been one of ‘never having truly gone camping, but sleeping on the roof of houseboat made for glorious star gazing, albeit a little on the cold side’; he hadn’t been able to keep a smirk off his face as he leaned in for another kiss when Anna came crashing back in and pulled me out of the room with a question about makeup…Chris and I both sighed heavily, shooting longing looks at the other as I was lead out of the room.

“ _Oh…a few hours._ ” I confessed, lying. I had been awake off and on all night, but she didn’t need to know that…”What’s going on?”

“Were you going to stop by your old store before heading out here?” My mother asked.

“I was gonna get coffee for the drive… _why_?”

“Would _youuuuuuuuu_ … _maybe_ get me another pound of the Christmas beans?”

Eyes rolling back into my head of their own volition, I tipped my head back, letting a silent groan out before answering, “Of course… _anything else_?”

“Will wants cannoli to go with Christmas dinner, so…Freed’s?”

“Okay.” I agreed, more than happy to go out of my way to pick up one of my favorite desserts to share with my mom and stepdad. “How many? You’ll take a bite out of one…I’ll kill two easily…”

“Why don’t you get half a dozen, and maybe a couple slices of tiramisu…and a slice of chocolate cake or two?” She instructed and I took a mental note.

“Alright…so, stop by Freed’s, then another pound of coffee… _that it_?” I asked.

“I think so, I’ll let you know if I think of anything else.” She told me, going on to ask after a pause to allow her a drag off her cigarette, “When are you heading out here?”

It was just after 8 AM, and I still had to shower, get ready and throw my toiletries in my bag…and that was before having to load up my car with the presents and my bags, make my stops to pick up the bakery items and fueling myself as well as the car up…

“Maybe 1…2. I’ll let you know.”

 “Please? The summit has snow on it, so be careful…” She pleaded.

“I will-” I reassured her, reaching with my right hand for my mostly empty mug. I took a sip of the room temperature liquid that covered the bottom of the cup, making a face at how sweet it was before adding, “-I always am…I’ll talk to you later, Mom. I love you.”

She begrudgingly signed off, reminding me to drive carefully and update her when I finally left to head over the hump to Pahrump.

“ _Hpppppppppfff…_ ” I sounded, blowing my breath out in a rush and making my lips bounce in the process.

“ _It’s gonna be a long week…_ ” I moaned as I leaned back, bending to stretch my back while my hands covered my face. I sat like that for five minutes, rubbing my eyes and face, trying to will myself into action; it wasn’t working until I reminded myself, “Alright, time to take round one of my vitamins…”

* * *

Chris sat in the living room, feet kicked up on cushion, enjoying the fire in the fireplace while he attempted to get caught up on reading one of the many books he’d started on recommendation while the snow fell outside the window. Dodger was on the floor next to the armchair Chris sat in, busy working on the bone Ma had picked up for him at the market.

Chris was trying to get back into one of the popular nonfiction books released earlier in the year, but the ‘gripping narrative’ touted on the back cover was proving difficult to find in the field of molecular biology, so he marked his page, closed the book and stretched just as his phone buzzed.

“Let’s see who this is…” He spoke quietly, peeking down at Dodger while snagging his phone from the little side table next to the arm of the chair. The incoming text preview showed a picture attached to the message, topped by TINKERBELL McSASSYPANTS; he smiled, chuckling softly, telling the dog, “ _Surprise, surprise, it’s Momma…_ ”

The dog’s head lifted from the floor, turning to glance back over his shoulder at Chris, mouth opening to let his tongue hang out the side in a happy grin.

Chris opened his camera, snapping a picture of his happy boy with his gnawed ham knuckle between his paws, sending it before he even glanced at her message.

**Dodger says ‘Hi Ma, I miss you!’**

**_Ohhhhhh! My fuzzy boy! I miss him!_ **

Chris laughed.

**I thought I was your fuzzy boy?**

**_Naw-he’s sweet, innocent and so soft._ **

**_You’re grumpy, stinky and not so innocent. :P_ **

**See if I let you play in my chest hair anymore…**

Chris finally scrolled up, checking the picture she had sent, it showed a bakery box full of good sized cannoli and a few pieces of a couple different cakes-chocolate, a white cake with fresh strawberries and two slices of tiramisu he spotted.

**_They won’t be ‘fresh’ for Christmas dessert, but this makes me happy._ **

**Hey!** **I thought I made you happy :P**

**_You are in a rare mood today…so sassy, Mr._ **

**You’re rubbing off on me :P**

**_I’d prefer YOU rub me off :O_ **

**Oh just wait…**

**Are you just teasing me with cannoli pictures and dirty text messages because you can or is there a reason?**

**_I’m about to head out to my Mom’s…six nights…pray for me_ **

**You love your mom, besides it can’t be THAT bad**

**_SHE’S GONNA MAKE ME GO TO THE PORN SHOP_ **

Chris laughed out loud, staring down at the screen of his phone, startling Dodger from chewing away on his treat.

“ _Sorry, bud…_ ” He giggled, “Fahhk, _I love your mom, dude_ …keeps me on my toes.”

**Excuse me, YOU are complaining about going to an adult bookstore? WHO are you & WHAT have you done with my fiancee?**

**_Chris…it’s ‘shopping’…WITH MY MOM._ **

He leaned back into the chair, cackling like mad.

**_She holds up shit from the clearance table and yells that she’ll buy it for me…and voluntarily gives me her reviews of the sex toys…_ **

**I see where you get from now babe**

**_FUCK YOU EVANS_ **

**I’m kidding, but not really…haha**

**_See if I get YOU anything fun for playtime now…_ **

**You know I love you Baby XOXO**

**_*grumbles*_ **

**Baby, don’t be like that. I was teasing you.**

**Kay?**

**Katie…**

**Are you seriously ignoring me right now? You are not a child, don’t act like one, please…unless you’re driving…**

**Are you driving?**

Chris frowned down at his screen, keeping the messages active for the next few minutes, and he sighed in relief when he saw she was texting back.

**_I wasn’t ignoring you, I figured I needed to get the bitch back in her cage, so I went back inside to buy a couple more cannoli to gnaw on, like D-Man and that bone._ **

  ** _See?_**

**_I told you I get bitchy…_ **

Frowning down at the phone, Chris took a moment to choose his words carefully before responding.

**I wouldn’t say ‘bitchy’ per se…and besides, you’re allowed to feel passionately-you’re a whirlpool of emotions and hormones, add in the vitamins and well…**

**_And?_ **

**And what?**

**_Aren’t you going to finish that train of thought, or did you catch the taste of your foot in your mouth, there Evans?_ **

Chris sat, staring at her text, trying to figure out if she was joking or if she was actually upset by what he’d sent, but luckily he didn’t have to wait long before an incoming call flashed on the screen, complete with the new picture he had assigned to her contact-one of Katie fast asleep and curled up against his side in bed after he had shown up on her doorstep for her birthday.

“ _Well…?_ ” She asked flatly; Chris swallowed.

“ _Ummm_ …I just meant…you just went through something big last month, you’re still sifting through the debris of what happened, and it’s an already whacked out time for you before adding all of that on top of it…” He explained, tapering off to silence; he waited for her to say something, anything, but when all he got was silence being broken by the sound of her engine starting up and the beeping of the Bluetooth connecting, Chris rushed to say, “Please don’t be mad at me… _Iloveyou._ ”

“I’m _not_ mad at you.” Katie said softly, sounding almost distracted as she reassured him. “I know that you’re saying that from a place of love and concern… _it’s just_ …-” The soft knocking of a turn signal came through the line while Katie paused and Chris realized she was leaving the shopping center and heading out to the surface streets of Vegas to leave town. “-you haven’t experienced first hand what ‘that time of the month’ is like for me. It’s _not pretty_ , Chris. I’m overly sensitive, I’m extremely cranky, I cry…I turn into a bottomless pit…”

He smiled at her admission, unable to help himself from interjecting, “You already **_ARE_** a bottomless pit.”

“Even _more_ of a bottomless pit…like, that’s **all** I do, I just graze for a week straight.” She admitted as a siren passed before she added, “You’ll be happy to know I should be pretty much done by the time you come back next week, so you’re spared for another month, but by then the ink will be dry on the marriage license and you can’t back out. You’re stuck with me.”

“I grew up with Ma, Carly and Shanna, _remember_? Cramps and hormones don’t scare me.” Chris reminded her. “Not buying you the right product when I know you’ll send me out on an emergency run for whatever you need…now **_THAT_** kind of scares me…”

“Don’t be,-” Katie laughed, the quiet ‘ticking’ of the turn signal sounded in the background again, “-I’m pretty easy when it comes to my feminine product preferences and I’m also extremely terrified of running out, so I stock pile…no, you’ll most likely end up on call for cravings, which I don’t think you’ll really have a problem with being sent out for ice cream, candy, and the like…”

“Should I keep a stash of candy hidden for myself?” Chris teased, scratching his right hand to his head while stretching his legs.

“You mean other than the one I already know about in the kitchen?” Katie chuckled and Chris joined in, agreeing. “If you want a stash that won’t be raided every month, I’d say that’s _probably_ a good idea…”

 ]“Are you telling me you plan on molesting my jelly beans, babe?” He grinned, trying to flirt over the phone, knowing she wasn’t looking forward to the drive in the gloomy weather and attempting to lift her spirits. Her loud laugh sounded like heaven.

“I happen to love molesting your ‘ _jelly beans_ ’, but lucky for you, jelly beans in general aren’t a personal favorite, but I will help myself to any Starburst beans I find in the house…except for the pink ones…” She confessed, making a sound of disgust, “ _Bleh_ …strawberry.”

“ _You weirdo_ , those are the **_best_** ones!” Chris argued, making Dodger turn to look back at him with a cocked head; lowering his hand, Chris patted his leg, calling Dodger to join him for a cuddle in the chair. The dog needed no nudging, he scrambling to stand, rushing over to climb up and crawl into Chris’ lap, licking his neck and chin and making him squirm at the tickling sensation while fighting the giggles.

“I can’t _believe_ you just said that…hey, can you be quiet for a minute, I have to order?”

Feeling his brow lift in curiosity, Chris asked, “Where are you? I thought you were headed out to your mom’s…”

“ _Shhhh…_ ” She told him, the soft hum of her window rolling down and he soon found out…

“ _Thank you for choosing our Starbucks, what can I get started for you this afternoon?_ ” The voice inquired, sounding like a young man, but he soon became excited, calling, “ _Oh my gosh, Katie? Is that you? Guys! Katie’s in drive, come say hi!_ ”

A symphony of voices called out and made Chris’ smile grow even larger at the evidence that the people Katie had considered her little makeshift family loved her and made a fuss over her appearing once again.

“Hi guys!” She called back, “I’ll talk to you up at the window! Mario, do we still have the Christmas sauces?”

“Yeah… _I mean_ , they’re low, but we can make whatever you want. What are you having today?”

“Let’s go with a quad venti Caramel Brulee latte, breve, 4 pumps brulee, 3 pumps chestnut praline, whip, with the praline toppings and no brulee sprinkles, extra hot…let’s go with a trenta ice water, extra ice, _aaaaand_ …a pumpkin loaf, don’t worry about taking it out of the plastic, I’m gonna eat it later, throw in a box of Cranberry Bliss bars and I need a pound of Christmas espresso, ground on paper, _pleeeeease._ ”

“Alright…it’s gonna be…$32.87. We’ll see you up at the window!”

Chris whistled low, fighting a smile.

“ _Oh hush_ …I don’t want to hear it, _Mr. Dunkin’ Donuts_ …” Katie laughed as the window rolled back up to keep the wind out. “That was Mario, _by the way_ …he’s a **_big_** fan…he’s actually the one I’d like to bring you into the store to surprise him before we leave. _He’s a doll_ …”

“We’ll see, baby…” Chris said, smiling as he closed his eyes, relaxing, “ _We’ll see._ ”

[Originally posted by coorpses](https://tmblr.co/ZtykUx1mjHoiQ)

* * *

Chris had stayed on the phone with me for most of the drive after I had left my old store, now having the last of the items I’d been instructed to come ‘home’ with for Christmas. We had talked about Dodger which segwayed into talking about animals-previous pets we’d each owned, animals we liked individually, the ones we agreed on, the ones we didn’t, finally agreeing that our house would most likely end up being a Dr. Doolittle situation with how we both loved our four legged friends.

I had arrived at my mom and stepdad’s house as the sun was nearing the mountains in the west, acting as a natural barrier between Nevada and California; pulling into the gravel outlet on their property, I saw my mother sitting out front, under the overhang of the roof, bundled up in her heavy jacket to fight off the chill of the winter desert storm rolling in.

My mother had greeted me, walking over to wait for me to exit my car. She was eager to start chatting, but I shoved my purse, the paper bag from Starbucks, and the bakery box into her arms while I went to gather up my bags, pillow and the stack of presents I had brought with me before herding her towards the front door before the storm finally broke.

Upon stepping up into the front entrance, I heard my mom calling to my stepdad, and soon the jangling of tags sounded, following the heavy, thumping gallop of my stepdad’s butter yellow English Labrador barreling down the hallway from the living room towards me. She was beyond happy to see me, as evidenced by the ‘smile’ she wore as she crashed into my legs, backing up only to ‘dance’ in sheer excitement, barking her greeting and licking the air since my hands were full.

“ _Hello, sweetie…hi, baby…I missed you…_ ” I had called to her as my stepfather, Will, had walked in from his office to help take things from my arms so I could love on the dog. “ _Yes, there’s presents for you too, Cassie…_ ”

I gave hugs to all three before stowing away my bags and getting settled in as the last of the sun slipped beyond the mountains and the sky grew darker.

* * *

My mother had asked what I wanted to do for dinner after a short period of catching up, and I had ended up sitting on the carpet, my back against the couch with Cassie having crawled into my lap for cuddles.

“We could get pizza, or go to the diner…there’s the chinese buffet…” She asked.

“Can we go to the Thai place? Peanut noodles sound _really good_ …” I volunteered, looking up from Cassie’s boxy head where I was busy scratching behind her ears and planting kisses all over her soft face.

“Okay, if you want to change, get a move on, let’s go while the weather holds…” Will had said, pushing to stand from the couch to change into a longer sleeved shirt and grab his jacket.

Dinner had been delicious, and after arriving back at the house, we turned into lumps on the couch until bedtime; Chris understood I’d have my mother attached to my hip once I got to the house, so he sent a few texts throughout the night, calling to leave a message on my voicemail when he went to bed with the promise of talking to me the next day.

* * *

Friday dawned with more rain, more wind, and the need of staying in and bundling up. It was a lazy day, with naps, soup, tea and movies… _Chris’ movies_ , since my mother wanted the scoop on him and knew I wouldn’t say no to watching them. We put on What’s Your Number, Playing It Cool, Before We Go, and throwing my stepdad a solid by putting on The Losers.

There were many questions, and quite a few appreciative sighs from my mom throughout the marathon, and when the man himself called, she insisted I put the call on speaker so she could talk to him.

Chris seemed to enjoy this development, because he got a modicome of promised karma when my mother voluntarily launched into telling him anything he wanted to know about what I had been like as a baby and young child, laughing his ass off when she told him about my habit of crawling to the bookshelf that housed my father’s collection of National Geographic magazine’s at nine months old and pulling them onto my body like a blanket of information.

“I’ve got pictures around here _somewhere_ …I’ll have to find them to show you one of these days, Chris, along with the ones of my baby girl in her diaper covered in feminine pads she stuck to herself…oh! The one of her on her training toilet, naked and covered in chicken pox with her hair sticking out at odd angles is a good one too…”

“ _ **NOOOOOOOOO!**_ ” I had yelled, lunging across the couch to take my phone back from her.

“ ** _YESSSSSS!_** ” Chris had called back, encouraging her, “I want to see **all** the embarrassing stuff you can dig up on her…my family has given her _too much_ intel on _me_ , I need to balance out the scale a little bit!”

“ _Aaaaaaaand_ we’re gonna **end** on that note…” I had proclaimed, finally getting my phone back and cutting Chris’ bonding time with my mother short. “I’ll talk to you later, when I’m _**ALONE**_.”

He grumbled and mumbled, letting me know he wasn’t happy about cutting in like that, but when he got me all to himself and we could talk about the upcoming week without having to watch what we said.

* * *

Saturday saw the storm blowing eastward, towards Vegas and onwards.

It also meant I had to brave the grocery store with my mom to pick up food for dinner and what I’d need to make lasagna and side dishes for the next day since we wouldn’t be having a ‘traditional’ Holiday meal with it only being the three of us and Cassie…and venturing out of the house to get those groceries meant we’d have to go past the one and only adult bookstore in town, and just like I had told Chris, my mother headed there first.

“Come on, _let’s go_!”

Slowly turning my head towards my mother, I couldn’t fight my lip curling of its own accord, grimacing at her call.

“Oh, _stop it_! _Don’t be so dramatic_ …it’s mother-daughter bonding time!”

“ _I don’t wanna…_ ” I grumbled.

“Well, if you _don’t_ come in, I’ll find something special to _surprise_ you with, and you can bet it’s gonna be _big_ …” She informed me, gathering up her purse and pulling the keys from the ignition. Opening the door, my mother looked over at me, asking, “It’s your choice…come in and walk around with me, or sit out here and expect the biggest novelty dildo they have in stock. What’s it gonna be?”

This wasn’t the first time she’d pulled this move on me, and I knew she’d make good on that threat, so I rolled my eyes, sighing in defeat and grabbed my purse angrily.

“ _That’s what I thought_ …although, I would have _loved_ hearing how you would have handled Chris finding King Dong in your stash…”

“We’re **NOT** talking about him while we’re in _there_ -” I told her, putting my foot down and setting my ground rules, “-and we’re **NOT** discussing our _sex life_ either!”

“Oh come on, are you _seriously_ going to tell me that you and he **HAVEN’T** gone shopping, or used any of…” My mother asked as we both exited her older Subaru, bracing for the strong winds and chill in the air around us.

“Mom, it’s ** _BAD ENOUGH_** you know what is in my ‘stash’…even **worse** is the fact that you bought a portion of it!” I expounded, gripping the strap of my purse tight and holding the hem of my oversized sweater down to keep it from flying up with the gusts pounding down on us through the gap between buildings as we walked to the front door. 

Opening the door, I held it, letting my mom inside first before joining her and stepping off to the side to reach for my wallet and my I.D. to appease the employee behind the counter, but when they called a greeting to Mom, recognizing her and me, in turn, I gave up and dropped it back into my purse; Mom headed straight to the clearance table and the racks of ‘clothes’ just on the outside of the security scanner, so I followed after her.

“ _You didn’t answer me…_ ” She called over her shoulder, looking at a teddy in fire engine red.

“And I told you, that’s **not** something I care to discuss…” I answered, folding my arms under my boobs and shooting her a look that backed up that claim. “I’ve told you _plenty of times_ , Mom…Ch…-” I said, starting to say his name and catching myself, I corrected the slip with using general terms any woman would use to discuss her significant other, “- ** _HE’S_** a private person. That’s something we both agreed to not talk about to other people, it’s between him and I, and it’s gonna stay that way… _like it should be_. And besides, you’re my **_MOM_** …I don’t want to talk to you about sex! It’s not like I’m prying you with questions about _**YOUR**_ sex life!”

“I have **NO** complaints…” She began but I stuffed my fingers in my ears.

“ ** _Nope!_** ” I proclaimed before trying to drown her out with, “ _ **La La La La La**_.. _ **.I DON’T WANT TO HEAR THIS…”**_

“Since when did you turn into a such a _prude_?” She asked, “ _Granted_ , it’s always been like pulling teeth to get you talk about this kind of thing with any of your other boyfriends…”

“ _Because we don’t want the world prying_ , Mom!” I explained, tilting my head to the left with an imploring look. Dropping my voice to little more than a whisper, I leaned in, telling her, “ _If you were in Chris’ shoes, and had the **whole** world trying to get as much of you as they could get, would you want that kind of information out there? Would you want people discussing what you do behind closed doors, in the privacy of your own home with someone you loved over the water cooler or at the nail salon?_ ”

The realization of what I had said shown on her face as it clicked in my mother’s head, and she at least had the common decency to look somewhat guilty for trying to get information out of me that I had expressed time and again was off the table for discussion…not only with her, but with the other members of my family that pried continuously as well, like my Grandmother, my cousins and even my aunts.

“Just know that I have _**NO**_ complaints about our _relationship_ , Mom.” I confessed, trying my best to let her know with the way I attempted to convey honest sincerity in my facial expression and with the gentle touch to her arm, going on to say, “He’s _sweet, gentle, kind…silly, he takes care of me in **every** way and in **every** aspect_ …so to appease you and to get you from asking anymore, **THAT** facet of our relationship is…-” I paused, searching for the right word in my mind, finally settling on something that summed up my sex life with Chris, grinning as I said, “- _splendiferous_.”

“ _‘Splendiferous’_ …Darling, you don’t need to impress me with your vocabulary, you remind me of your father when you do that…” She sighed, putting the teddy back on the rack with a knowing glance in my direction before moving on to enter the heart of the store. “As long as you’re happy, that’s all I care about.”

“I’m _exceedingly_ happy…” I reassured her from two steps behind.

“ _Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like to know what it’s like to have sex with a mov…_ ”

My eyes rounded, figuring out where she was steering her sentence, and before I knew it, my arm shot forward, landing a quick but solid ‘swat’ with the snap of my wrist against her arm.

“ ** _Shhhh!_** ” I hissed, glancing back at the person behind the counter; they were buried nose first in the newspaper, so I let my breath out in a rush just as my mother lifted her left hand to rub at her arm, shooting her own menacing glare back at me.

“ _Let’s drop the subject, please…_ ” I asked, feeling a headache forming as I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I know you brought me in here for a reason, so why don’t you show me whatever it is that brought us in here today…”

Grabbing my hand, my mother pulled me to follow her, rounding the end of the aisle at the far end of the store where the novelty items were displayed, stopping in front of the ‘licensed’ blow up dolls. She bent at the waist, reaching for a familiar box to hold up for my perusal-a handsome man with only the barest sliver of a likeness to Chris posed on the front, wearing tiny ‘briefs’ that matched the blue of the Cap suit in the first Avengers movies, a bad quality Cap cowl on his head and the shield in his hand spoke of what the doll inside the box was modeled after.

My mother bit her lips, giggling softly before lifting her hand to her mouth as she broke out laughing.

“Does he _know_ there’s a blow up doll modeled after _‘him’_?” She asked, her free hand making ‘air quotes’ while fighting off more giggles as she looked at me in all seriousness.

I really wanted to keep a straight face, to keep my _‘our sex life is our business, and OURS alone’_ stance, but I just couldn’t help myself…this one was different from the one we saw back in Boston, and it looked like better quality too…

“Yeah… _he knows_.” I admitted, grinning as I went on to confess, “ _I_ showed it to him last month, _when we stopped at a porn shop on our way to the airport to pick up his brother…he wasn’t terribly impressed by it!_ ”

Luckily, the trip to the adult bookstore was over quickly, and we ventured on to the grocery store, but before we left, something caught the corner of my eyes, making me stop and do a double take, breaking into a wide smile and covering my mouth as a hearty laugh escaped me.

“What’s so funny?” Mom had asked, stopping next to me once she doubled back. We stood in front of a wall display full of varying types of lubricants.

“ _Inside joke_ …” I giggled as I stared down an economy sized display of _‘Boink N’ Oink-Bacon Flavored Lube’_. She took a second to follow my eyes, figuring out what I was looking at before she reached out, picking up a bottle to hold closer to her face for better inspection.

“Well, _I can tell you right now_ , this stuff **_isn’t_** as great as you’d think it would be…” My mother admitted, shaking her head in disappointment while setting it back on the shelf; she turned to look at me, face serious as she went on, saying, “It stinks up your room, has a weird aftertaste and I **STILL** can’t get the stain completely out of that set of sheets…”

_**“OhmyGod…**_ ” I laughed, rushing to walk away from her to regain my composure.

* * *

Luckily, grocery shopping on Christmas Eve in Pahrump was nowhere near the war zone that it could have been if we had been in Las Vegas; Mom and I got our stuff in thirty minutes, only having to wait on the Meat Department to finish up with the load they had received to get a couple of beef knuckles for Cassie as a treat.

I left Mom to take care of the bill while I went to the coffee kiosk, treating her and I to something warm and delicious from the only ‘Bux in town before braving the weather one last time to get home.

As soon as we got back to the house, my mission began-I organized the groceries into piles of what needed to be prepped to start cooking up gravy for the lasagna, what needed to go into the fridge, and what I would be baking later before actually beginning.

It was early enough in the day that my gravy would meet my standards by the time I needed to assemble the main dish for tomorrow’s dinner, and began working on making pasta dough for spinach and cheese ravioli to have tonight with the steaks we had bought. I grew up with the tradition of Christmas (and Thanksgiving) being free passes when it came to overloading on carbs, my father’s thinking being, ‘It’s a Holiday…calories don’t count on Holidays’ and with my stepfather bringing his tradition of treating his family to a nice steak dinner on Christmas Eve, we adapted the two into one.

Mom had never been a fan of the stress of planned and executing a big, traditional Holiday meal, always suggesting that we go out, so _‘somebody else can cook and clean up because what do you do? Spend a week gearing up for it and in ten minutes, it’s over and you have to spend the next four hours cleaning up!_ ’, so if I wanted ‘Thanksgiving’ or ‘Christmas’ dinner, I had to cook it…but with both my mother and stepfather popping in and out of the kitchen all afternoon and into the evening to offer assistance, I couldn’t complain. 

Even Cassie came in to see what was going on, but I had the sneaking suspicion she was hoping to find ‘crumbs’ and beg for tastes, which I knew were a ‘no-no’…my stepdad, Will, didn’t tolerate her begging, but he was okay with offering her little pieces of people food here and there.

It was nearly 7 PM when Chris’ contact picture showed up on my phone, alerting me to his request to Face Time; I was busy multitasking-one hand stirring the gravy in the large stock pot on the back of the stove one minute before kneading bread dough on the counter and back, the other moving back and forth between the other large pot cooking the ravioli and checking the steaks in the pan at the front of the stove.

“ _ **MAAAAAAAA!**_ ” I yelled. “ _Come in here_ , _I need you to answer my phone, Chris is calling! **Hurry up!**_ **”**

The sound of her footsteps pounding towards the kitchen, followed closely by the heavy gallop of Cassie tailing her; she popped around the wall, reaching for my phone and accepting, smiling down at the screen.

“ _Hell-oooo_ , Christopher…” She called, prolonging her greeting.

“ ** _Oh, shit!_** ” He announced, surprised at seeing someone other than me answering.

“ _Oh_ , **THAT** wasn’t creepy at **ALL** , Mother…” I announced, exasperated but amused at Chris’ reaction. Calling to him as she turned the phone to face me, I explained, “ _Sorry_ , I’m in the middle of cooking…Hi, Baby!”

“ _Heeeeeey_ …sorry, you just kinda took me by surprise there, Patti…” He laughed, and I could just barely see he was blushing from the other side of the long breakfast bar that separated my mother and I.

“ _We’ve been over this_ , Chris…call me ‘ _Mom_ ’, you’re gonna be my son-in-law, just call me ‘ _Mom_ ’…” She reminded him, and I smiled.

“Okay…sorry, _Mom_.” He corrected himself before confessing with his hand pushing through his hair, shining like it was wet in the low light of his childhood bedroom, “I’m just really glad I listened to the little voice inside my head that told me maybe _**now** wasn’t the best time_ to call you up… _naked_.”

Both my mother and I laughed out loud, a muted chuckle coming to drift in from the living room where my stepfather was watching one of his many shows, this one showing what life was like for people living and hunting alligators on the southern swamps of Louisiana.

“ _Yeeeeeah…_ ” I agreed, nodding my head with a soft chuckle. “Considering the nice, **_loooong talk_** I had with my mother about **_certain_** topics today, you giving her a show and pretty much answering **ALL** of those questions…I think that might have blown all that effort of keeping our sex life private to smithereens, Babe.”

His forehead lifted high, eyes huge and round as he shifted, uncomfortable at my admission.

“Maybe I should text _before_ …” He stated, and I laughed, turning what was going to be my steak over one last time.

“That would **_probably_** be a good idea…text before you get another urge like that, please. I don’t need you getting a wild hair up your ass, and giving my relatives a show, _jeez man_ …”

“ _Not that I’d complain…_ ” I heard my mother mutter, and I shot her a glare.

“ _You did **NOT** just say that…he’s gonna be your **son-in-law**! **Stop it!**_ ”

“He’s a _handsome man_! _I **can’t** appreciate it?_ ” She asked; Chris burst out laughing, cackling at my mother’s question, and more importantly, my reaction…

“ _ **NOT LIKE THAT YOU CAN’T!**_ ” I exclaimed. “ _The **ONLY** person in this family seeing his **wiener** , is **ME**!_ ”

A faint, _‘I would HOPE so! I don’t need to see it…_ ’ came in from my stepdad, and Chris rocked back on his bed, laughing even harder.

Standing perfectly still, I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath before exhaling, trying to find my ‘center’ before opening my eyes and connecting with Chris on the screen, asking, “ _Are you **SURE** you want to marry into **THIS**? She-”_ I pointed at my mom, crooking her finger to have her join me on this side of the jutting counter where she soon joined me, a shit eating grin spreading her face as she flipped the camera around to show us both, “- **SHE** isn’t even the **WORST** …that would be my Gram…”

Chris was beaming, nodding his head happily, eyes crinkled and shaking with his quiet giggles.

Sighing dramatically, I just rolled my eyes, telling him, _“Don’t say I didn’t warn you…”_

“ _Oh, Babe…_ ” Chris chuckled, grinning from ear to ear, “You **_didn’t_** run away screaming from **MY** family… _and besides_ , your mom’s kinda funny.”

“Chris… _don’t_ encourage her.” I groaned as the woman in question grinned, lifting her hand to press to her mouth, blowing a kiss towards the screen and earning a laugh from my fiancee.

“ _You can’t tell me what to do…_ ” He snickered.

“ _Oh yes I **can**_ , _we’re getting married_ …I’m gonna be your wife, _I get the last say_!” I teased.

“ _Annnnnd_ pieces are starting to fall into place!” He cackled; a chuckle came drifting in from the living room. I caught Chris, out of the corner of my eye as I checked on the steaks, turn to address my mom, saying, “I see where she gets it from… _you are the influence!_ ”

They were getting along like a house on fire, a sudden spark in an unexpected moment, and poof, instant friends.

Calling Will into the kitchen, I announced tonight’s dinner was ready, and plated up Cassie’s dinner.

“Are you going to be up for a while?” I asked Chris, wiping my hands on a dish towel as I squeezed into frame of the camera. He nodded in tiny movements, taking a long drink from his bottle of winter lager. “Can I call you back after dinner?”

His brows came crashing down in confusion. He swallowed, clearing his throat to ask, “I _thought_ …I thought I’d stay on the call, you could just prop the phone up…”

“And watch us eat?” I ribbed, “ _You fucking weirdo_ …I’m telling Ma you’re cheating on her culinary skills by watching us eat and licking your lips with longing…”

“ _Oh, it’s not the food I’m hungry for_ …” He joked right back and my mother feigned shock, lifting a hand to her chest.

“ _Oh my…_ ”

_“I don’t need to hear that, son…I’m getting ready to eat…_ ” Will called, his left hand raised in a halt, walking past us to round the breakfast counter and get his plate without looking at the phone. The three of us, Mom, Chris and I, all laughed.

“ _Yeaaaaah_ , I’m gonna fit right in…” Chris announced, smiling.

* * *

Dinner was full of Chris cracking jokes and learning more and more about his soon to be in-laws; Katie kept her mother on a short leash, cutting off any attempt at her divulging any information she deemed embarrassing, much to his disappointment, but after the delicious looking steaks were consumed, and all the homemade ravioli were eaten along with the steamed veggies, he noticed Katie kept turning and looking down at the other side of her chair, picking little pieces of food from her plate as well as the serving plates to offer to something.

When he called her out for her actions, Katie grinned, reaching for the phone to show him a beautiful yellow Lab with the biggest smile and a happy otter-like tail beating an excited tattu against the carpet on the dark pergo floor of the dining room.

“Babe, _this_ is Cassie…” Katie introduced, and Chris couldn’t hold in the gasp of sheer delight at finally seeing the dog she’d told him about with such love and reverence in quiet moments, usually when they had Dodger curled up with them in bed…or more accurately, when Dodger was wedged into Katie’s side, ignoring Chris.

The room laughed at his response and Chris was unphased that he let his love of the canine species take the wheel.

“ _Hello, beautiful…she’s gorgeous!_ Oh my goodness, Kay, _I’m in **LOVE**_ **!** ”He shouted, startling Dodger from his sleep, and he felt just the tiniest sliver of guilt.

“Hey, _admire_ all you like, son…but she’s **_my_** pride and joy.” Will teased from out of frame.

“ _Oh **GREAT**_ …the first pair of big, sad brown eyes that crosses your path and I’ve lost you!” Katie laughed.

“Only when those beautiful eyes are attached to four legs, _I promise_!”

* * *

Once dinner was finished, Will had offered to wash up the plates and my mother tried sneaking off to the living room with my phone, still video chatting with Chris.

“ ** _Nuh-uh…_** ” I proclaimed, waving a finger in the air when I caught her trying to round the corner; she stopped, turning to look at me with wide eyes at being caught. “ **Nope** , if you want to keep talking, you stay in **HERE** …where I can monitor what you two giggling Gerties talk about!”

“ _Awwww, COME ON! That’s no fair, babe!_ ” I heard Chris shout from the other side of the call, a distinct laugh in his voice as he went on to add, “ _I wanna hear all about what you were like as a little girl…I want to get some dirt on you!_ ”

“ ** _Denied!_** ” I shouted back. “You want dirt, you gotta get it **IN** person, like I did!”

“ _Deal_.” Chris answered, almost a little too quickly I noted.

“Good…now how about I call you back in a little bit so I can finish getting these lasagna trays put together and clean up the rest of the kitchen?”

“Okay… _I guess_.” Chris said just as my mother protested my cutting their conversation short, but leveling her with a stern glare, she quit, but not before shooting me her own death glare with an accompanying middle finger and her tongue stuck out.

We said our farewells, and as soon as my mother had ended the call, she was on me.

“And what the hell was _**THAT**_ , Kathryn Elizabeth?” She asked, propping her fist on her hip while her other hand set my phone on the counter top and eventually rested on the edge, leaning into the granite. “Are you **ashamed** of me?”

Hearing her, the left side of my face scrunched up, partially in confusion, partially in shock. Turning away from the pot of noodles I set to boiling just a few minutes earlier, I faced her.

“ _Excuse me?_ ”

“Are you **ashamed** of me? Is that why you _**don’t**_ want me talking to him without **YOUR** hawk-like supervision?”

Resting all my weight on my left leg, I cocked my hip with my fist on it.

“ **No**. I’m **not** ashamed of you, mom… _why_ would you think that?” I asked, hurt at her words.

“You _won’t_ let me have a moment alone with him…you shut down any train of thought you think is going to lead to me talking about your… _OUR_ past…”

“Because I _know_ you’ll tell him all the embarrassing stories you can! Mom, I’m **not** ashamed of you…I’m just scared he’s gonna cut and run…I’m worried the other shoe is gonna drop and he’s gonna disappear…that I’m gonna wake up one day and find out this was all a dream.” I confessed turning back to stir the gravy.

“Katie…you _can’t_ live your life like tha…” She began to say I cut in.

**“I KNOW!”** I shouted, whipping my face around to show her my suddenly emotional face. I could feel my eyes welling with tears, spilling with each blink as I choked out, “ ** _I know_** … _I just_ …I’ve **never** felt like this before, for _anyone_ …I’m _**scared**_ , _okay_? I’m in uncharted territory with him…and it _scares_ the ever-living shit out of me, Mom.”

The stunned look on her face, paired with the soft call from my stepfather in the living room asking if everything was alright, had me hanging my head in shame at my outburst.

“ _Can I have some privacy please?_ ” I asked quietly, focusing on tomorrow’s meal prep, and when I looked back up, I saw that she had left me alone.

By the time I had finished up twenty minutes later, cleaned up the kitchen and walked into the living room, my mom sat waiting for me with a somber expression.

“ _I’m sorry._ ” I apologized; she nodded, telling me she accepted it before standing and approaching me with arms outstretched.

“It’s alright.. _.I understand, sweetheart_.” She told me with a kiss to my cheek. “But I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way to talks to you…I don’t think you have anything to worry about. _He **loves** you_.”

Sighing, I relaxed, hugging her tighter as I admitted, “ _Yeah_ , but I’m still scared…everything’s moved _so fast_ between us…first the baby, then getting engaged…now moving to L.A.”

“Sweetheart, _you’re_ the product of a quick moving relationship, _or did you forget?_ ” She chuckled, rubbing one hand over my back while the other petted my hair. “I met your father in October, we were engaged by Thanksgiving, and were going to be married on Valentine’s Day if your grandfather hadn’t’ve passed away unexpectedly and we had to postpone a month…five months. Five months from first meeting to married.”

Nodding, I remembered their story, taking comfort in her words, but I couldn’t shake the knowledge that after almost thirty years, they had decided it was time to go their separate ways and two years later, my father was gone forever…

“Hey, don’t worry about it…” My mother told me, trying to break me from my internal reflection with a little shake. “It’s _Christmas Eve_ …get ready for bed, that way Santa can get here _sooner_!”

Chuckling, looked her in the eyes, saying, “ _You know **who** you sound like?_ ”

“ _Oh shut up!_ ” She told me with a tap to my shoulder, knowing I was making fun of her for slipping into a damn good impression of her mother without even trying. “Go get ready for bed, I’m gonna go smoke and then lock up…tell Chris I said goodnight?”

“ _Of course_ …I love you, crazy lady.” I told her with another hug and a kiss to her temple.

“ _I love you too_ , goodnight darling.”

It took me a moment to say goodnight to my stepdad, heading into the guest room to gather up my bedclothes to change into while I used the restroom, washing my face, taking my contacts out, brushing my teeth…and taking the last round of prenatal vitamins for the day, making sure to stuff them back into the bottom of my toiletry bag before gathering up my dirty clothes from the day and heading back into the bedroom to get comfy.

* * *

Chris was propped up in bed, fighting to stay awake as he read when his phone sounded, startling him and Dodger both with the loud, obnoxious ringer telling him Katie was video calling him.

“ _Hey, Pretty Lady_ …” He greeted her sleepily once he answered. “I was beginning to wonder if you forgot about me, how’d lasagna making go?”

“ _I miss you._ ” Katie sighed and Chris rubbed his eyes, squinting to focus on her better.

“Babe, _what’s the matter_? Your eyes are puffy…have you been crying?”

“I shouted at my mom a little while ago.” She confessed, sagging back into the pillows behind her.

“Why’d you…?”

“She struck a nerve and I just sort of snapped…she thinks I’m ashamed of her, of my family because I keep you at arms length from them.” She explained and Chris frowned.

“Well, _are you_?” He inquired hesitantly.

“No.” Katie sobbed softly, covering her eyes.

“ _Then why…?_ ”

“ _Because I’m still scared I’m gonna lose you, Chris._ ”

“ _Babe…_ ” He sighed, scrubbing his hand over his face, “How many times are we going to go over this…I’m **NOT** going anywhere. I _**LOVE**_ you. We’re getting married… _soon_!”

“ _I know_ …I’ve just been in my head **_so much_** this week, Chris!” She told him, rubbing her eyes before choking up and his heart broke at seeing her face pinch, more tears welling in her eyes as she went on to tell him, “ _I’m **ready** for you to be **here** …I’m **ready** for New Year’s…I’m **ready** for **this part** to be **over already** …_”

“ _Me too, Kay_ …hey, _listen to me_ … _I’ll be there **before** you know it, okay?_” He told her, knowing his promise would come true in roughly 24-ish hours. “ _I’ll be there_ , and then we can start the _**final** countdown_…”

Her soggy laughs caught his ears, and Chris saw her frown had turned into a small smile.

“I _know_ I told you to change the song from _emo Christmas music_ , but _no more_ Eighties Hair bands…and _so help me_ , Christopher, _don’t you da_ …”

Smiling, he knew exactly what she was going to say, so he went there…

“ ** _‘IT’S THE FINAL COUNTDOOOOOWN!_** ” He sang loudly and Katie face palmed at the same moment a loud pounding came from the wall he shared with Scott.

“ _ **Shut up**! I’m **trying** to fall asleep so Santa can get his **fat, jolly red ass** here sooner…_ ”

[Originally posted by gifandmemeammunition](https://tmblr.co/Z3FR1q-tLGp_)


End file.
